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Shattering Expectations & Confronting Imposter Syndrome in Professional Women

Grace Loh

In the realm of professional achievement, women have made significant strides in breaking through the glass ceiling and ascending to leadership roles. Women already face significant challenges in rising to leadership roles, compounded by systemic factors such as gender bias, lack of representation, and stereotypes. These barriers are exacerbated by the prevalence of imposter syndrome, which becomes a damaging self-sabotaging barrier. This pervasive and insidious psychological phenomenon, characterised by feelings of self-doubt and a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud, can hinder women's confidence, and impede their career advancement. In this article, we delve into the complexities of imposter syndrome, its impact on professional women, and strategies to overcome it.

 

Imposter syndrome, first identified by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, is a psychological pattern whereby individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud despite external evidence of competence. Research suggests that imposter syndrome disproportionately affects women, particularly in male-dominated industries and leadership positions. Imposter syndrome displays as a chronic sense of inadequacy despite evidence of competence and success. This phenomenon can manifest in various ways, including feelings of fraudulence, downplaying capabilities and attributing success to luck or external factors rather than their own abilities, and avoiding opportunities for fear of failure or being discovered as an imposter.

 

Imposter syndrome can have profound implications for professional women, hindering their career progression and overall well-being. Women experiencing imposter syndrome may exhibit diminished confidence, experience a perpetuating cycle of self-doubt, refrain from asserting themselves, and develop heightened stress and anxiety in the workplace. Furthermore, imposter syndrome contributes to the perpetuation of gender disparities in leadership and organisational representation, as women may self-select out of opportunities for advancement and leadership roles due to feelings of inadequacy.

 

Strategies for Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

Women must identify and challenge the inner critic that fuels imposter syndrome. Developing self-awareness and reframing negative thoughts can help counteract feelings of inadequacy.

·     Identifying Negative Thought Patterns:

The first step in cognitive restructuring is to develop self-awareness by identifying the specific negative thoughts and beliefs associated with imposter syndrome. This may involve paying attention to recurring self-critical thoughts such as "I'm not good enough," "I don't deserve this success," or "I'm a fraud."

·     Examining Evidence:

Once negative thought patterns are identified, the next step is to critically examine the evidence supporting these beliefs. Women experiencing imposter syndrome are encouraged to challenge the accuracy and validity of their negative self-assessments. They may ask themselves questions such as, "What evidence supports this belief?" or "Is there evidence that contradicts this belief?"

·     Generating Alternative Perspectives:

Cognitive restructuring involves generating alternative, more balanced perspectives, or interpretations of situations. Women are encouraged to consider alternative explanations for their achievements and successes, recognizing their skills, efforts, and contributions. This process helps to counteract the tendency to attribute success to luck or external factors rather than personal competence.

·     Replacing Irrational Thoughts:

After challenging negative beliefs and generating alternative perspectives, women can actively replace irrational thoughts with more realistic and positive ones. This may involve developing affirmations or positive self-statements that affirm their abilities and accomplishments. For example, replacing "I'm a fraud" with "I have worked hard to achieve my success and deserve recognition for my accomplishments" can help shift the focus from self-doubt to self-affirmation.

·     Practice and Repetition:

Cognitive restructuring is a skill that requires practice and repetition. Women experiencing imposter syndrome may benefit from regularly practicing cognitive restructuring techniques, particularly in situations that trigger feelings of self-doubt or inadequacy. Over time, challenging negative thought patterns and replacing them with more adaptive beliefs can lead to lasting changes in self-perception and confidence.

 

Celebrate Achievements

To counter imposter syndrome, it is crucial for women to actively celebrate their achievements and recognise their contributions. Rather than attributing success solely to luck or external factors, women should acknowledge their role in their accomplishments and take pride in their abilities. One effective strategy is to keep a journal of achievements, where women can document their successes, big or small, along with the efforts and skills that contributed to them. This journal serves as a tangible reminder of competence, allowing women to reflect on their capabilities during moments of self-doubt. Moreover, celebrating achievements fosters a sense of accomplishment and reinforces positive self-perception, helping to counteract the negative beliefs perpetuated by imposter syndrome. By consciously acknowledging and celebrating their successes, women can cultivate a greater sense of self-worth and confidence, ultimately empowering them to overcome imposter syndrome and thrive in their professional endeavours.

 

Cultivate a Supportive Network

Building a supportive network of mentors, peers, and allies is an invaluable strategy for countering imposter syndrome among professional women. By surrounding themselves with individuals who provide validation and perspective, women can combat the feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy that often accompany imposter syndrome. Mentors, in particular, offer guidance, wisdom, and encouragement based on their own experiences navigating similar challenges in their careers. They can provide valuable insights and advice, helping women to gain clarity and confidence in their abilities. Peers who understand and empathise with imposter syndrome can offer reassurance and solidarity, creating a sense of belonging and normalising the experiences of self-doubt. Allies within the workplace can advocate for women's achievements and contributions, affirming their value and potential. By connecting with supportive individuals who understand the nuances of imposter syndrome, women can receive the encouragement and validation they need to overcome self-limiting beliefs and realise their full potential. This network not only provides emotional support but also offers practical guidance and perspective, empowering women to navigate challenges with resilience and confidence.

 

Embrace a Growth Mindset

Adopting a growth mindset is a powerful approach for countering imposter syndrome among professional women. At its core, a growth mindset entails believing that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work, rather than being fixed traits. By embracing this perspective, women can reframe challenges as opportunities for learning and personal growth, rather than insurmountable obstacles. Instead of interpreting setbacks as evidence of incompetence or failure, women with a growth mindset view them as natural parts of the learning process and opportunities to refine their skills and strategies.

Central to adopting a growth mindset is the recognition that mastery and resilience are cultivated through perseverance and resilience in the face of adversity. Women are encouraged to embrace setbacks as valuable learning experiences that contribute to their overall development and success. Each challenge becomes an opportunity to stretch beyond one's comfort zone, acquire new knowledge, and build resilience in the face of obstacles.

Furthermore, women can cultivate a growth mindset by reframing their interpretation of feedback and criticism. Rather than viewing feedback as a reflection of personal inadequacy, they can see it as constructive input for improvement and development. This mindset shift enables women to approach feedback with openness and curiosity, leveraging it as a tool for growth rather than a source of validation or judgment.

 

 

Skill Development and Mastery

Skill development and mastery play a crucial role in bolstering the confidence and competence of professional women, thereby mitigating feelings of imposter syndrome. Actively seeking opportunities for skill enhancement and mastery allows women to not only broaden their knowledge base but also refine their existing skill set, ultimately leading to improved performance and validation of their capabilities. Engaging in skill development initiatives empowers women to validate their competence through tangible achievements and accomplishments.

By actively pursuing opportunities for learning and growth, women can expand their repertoire of skills and knowledge, equipping themselves with the tools necessary to excel in their respective fields. This proactive approach not only enhances their professional competence but also instils a sense of empowerment and self-assurance. As women acquire new skills and deepen their expertise, they gain a greater sense of mastery over their roles and responsibilities, thereby reducing feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt associated with imposter syndrome.

Furthermore, skill development serves as a tangible form of validation, providing concrete evidence of women's abilities and contributions in the workplace. As women achieve proficiency in new areas or master challenging tasks, they receive external recognition and feedback that reinforces their sense of competence and diminishes imposter feelings. Moreover, honing existing skills allows women to showcase their expertise and make meaningful contributions to their organisations, further solidifying their confidence and sense of belonging.

 

Seek Professional Help

Psychotherapy and counselling offer tailored interventions to counter imposter syndrome, providing a structured framework for addressing underlying beliefs and behaviours contributing to feelings of inadequacy. Unlike self-help strategies, psychotherapy involves working with a trained therapist who can offer personalised guidance and support based on the individual's unique experiences and needs. Through psychotherapy, individuals can explore the root causes of their imposter syndrome, such as childhood experiences, societal pressures, or internalized beliefs, and develop coping strategies to challenge negative thought patterns and build self-confidence. Counselling, on the other hand, typically focuses on providing support and guidance through talk therapy sessions, offering a safe space for individuals to express their thoughts and emotions surrounding imposter syndrome and receive validation and encouragement. By addressing imposter syndrome in a therapeutic setting, individuals can gain insight into their self-perceptions and learn effective strategies for managing and overcoming feelings of inadequacy, ultimately leading to greater self-awareness, resilience, and personal growth.

In addition to psychotherapy and counselling, coaching is another valuable approach for addressing imposter syndrome and fostering personal growth. Coaching differs from therapy in that it typically focuses on goal-setting, skill development, and performance enhancement rather than delving into deep-rooted psychological issues. A coach works collaboratively with the individual to identify specific goals related to overcoming imposter syndrome and develops actionable strategies to achieve them.

Through coaching, individuals with imposter syndrome can receive targeted support and guidance to build confidence, challenge self-limiting beliefs, and develop effective coping mechanisms. Coaches provide accountability, encouragement, and feedback, empowering individuals to take proactive steps towards overcoming imposter syndrome and achieving their professional goals. Coaching sessions often involve techniques such as visualization, goal-setting, and cognitive-behavioural strategies tailored to the individual's unique needs and challenges. Coaches help individuals identify their strengths, recognise their achievements, and reframe negative thinking patterns that contribute to imposter syndrome. By providing a supportive and non-judgmental environment, coaches help individuals navigate through self-doubt and build resilience, ultimately empowering them to thrive in their careers and personal lives.

Imposter syndrome poses a significant barrier to the advancement and fulfillment of professional women. By understanding its manifestations and implementing strategies to overcome it, women can shatter the glass ceiling and thrive in their careers. Through self-awareness, support networks, and a commitment to personal growth, women can confront imposter syndrome head-on and realise their full potential. It's time to break free from the shackles of self-doubt and embrace the limitless possibilities that await beyond the glass ceiling.

By Satomi Ogata February 1, 2025
At 17, one of my teachers told me I was dyslexic and that I needed to “work extra hard” to succeed. At 33, an educational psychologist officially diagnosed me with broad dyslexia (Reading Comprehension Impairment) and visual-spatial reasoning difficulties. However, the true turning point in my journey came at 37 when I was diagnosed with ADHD. It was a moment of clarity that reframed decades of self-doubt and burnout. Burnout and the Breaking Point The tipping point came when I experienced severe burnout at work. I’ve always taken immense pride in my career, pouring my passion into creating opportunities and fostering growth for others. As an HR professional working for one of the most purposeful organizations, I was determined to give my best. But no matter how hard I worked, I couldn’t shake the relentless feeling that I was falling short or that I wasn’t good enough.This internal battle slowly eroded my confidence until I found myself doubting my ability to perform even the simplest tasks. It felt like the harder I tried, the further behind I fell. The burnout, however, wasn’t just about work. It was the culmination of years of unprocessed emotions, cultural pressures, and the invisible toll of undiagnosed ADHD. For so long, I had been carrying an emotional and mental weight that I didn’t even realize was there. I was trying to meet impossible standards, juggling conflicting cultural expectations, and masking my struggles -including myself - would see how overwhelmed I truly was. Growing up as a Japanese woman, the cultural pressure to conform was ever-present. The phrase “the nail that sticks out gets hammered” (出る釘は打たれる) loomed large in my life, discouraging individuality and emphasizing the importance of fitting in. This cultural backdrop made navigating hidden disabilities like dyslexia, ADHD, and autism particularly isolating. In many Asian communities, neurodivergence is often misunderstood or seen as something to be “fixed.” Statements like “you just need to work harder” or dismissals of struggles as “bad parenting” are common and contribute to the stigma surrounding mental health. These deep-seated beliefs made seeking support feel daunting and, at times, even shameful. Meeting Mia: The Power of Relatability in Therapy In the depths of my burnout, I reached out to Dr. Glenn Graves, my former therapist in Singapore, who referred me to Mia Makino, a Japanese American therapist. From our very first session, I felt an immediate connection with Mia. She didn’t just listen; she truly understood. She recognized the cultural nuances of being Japanese and bicultural, as well as the complexities of navigating the duality between two distinct cultural frameworks. I did not expect how transformative this sense of relatability would be. Mia’s unique perspective allowed her to address not only the symptoms of my ADHD and burnout but also the deeply rooted cultural stigmas and self-doubt that has been holding me back for so long. Through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), she helped me unpack years of internalized shame and perfectionism - traits so often reinforced by societal expectations in Japan. Mia’s approach to therapy wasn’t just about the symptoms; it was about empowering me to embrace who I am. She helped me see that my ADHD and dyslexia were not weaknesses but parts of me that could be understood, managed, and even celebrated. Her guidance gave me permission to stop fighting so hard to fit into a mold that was never meant for me. Sharing My Story to Empower Others Seeking therapy and working with someone who truly understood both my neurodivergence and my cultural identity was one of the most pivotal decisions of my life. It gave me the tools to heal, the courage to embrace my authentic self, and the clarity to redefine my path. By sharing my story, I hope to encourage others to seek support and break free from the stigma surrounding mental health and neurodivergence. Diagnoses like ADHD are not limitations; they are opportunities to better understand ourselves and to create lives that align with our strengths and needs. For anyone navigating similar challenges—whether cultural, neurodivergent, or both—know that you are not alone. The right support, whether through therapy, coaching, or community, can make a world of difference. And remember, the journey toward self-compassion begins with the courage to embrace who you are, unapologetically and wholeheartedly. A New Chapter: From Healing to Advocacy Thanks to Mia’s support, I’m now transitioning into a new chapter of my life. I’m designing training programs and workshops for HR professionals and leaders in Asia to help break the stigma surrounding neurodivergence. My mission is to create workplaces that are inclusive, supportive, and free from discrimination—environments where people can thrive regardless of their differences. I’m also pursuing certifications as an ADHD and executive coach to support individuals who may feel isolated or misunderstood. I want to be an advocate for those struggling in silence, helping them find their voice, their confidence, and their potential. For so long, I believed that being the “nail that sticks out” was a flaw. But now, I see it as a strength. Every challenge I’ve faced has brought me closer to understanding who I am. And in that understanding, I’ve found not only healing but also purpose—the opportunity to help others embrace their own journeys and create a world where the invisible becomes invincible. Satomi Ogata https://www.linkedin.com/in/satomi-beyondbias/
By Mariangel Gonzalez January 28, 2025
In the journey of life, interpersonal relationships play a fundamental role. From a Reiki perspective, these connections are not just human encounters but profound opportunities for spiritual growth, energy exchange, and mutual healing.  Universal Energy and Relationships Reiki is based on the idea that everything in the universe is connected through universal energy. Every relationship we form—whether with family, friends, colleagues, or partners—is influenced by the flow of this energy. When our energies are balanced and flow harmoniously, our interactions also tend to be more positive and enriching. However, when our energies are imbalanced, conflicts, misunderstandings, and tensions may arise. Reiki teaches us that by healing and balancing our internal energy, we can also improve our external relationships. The Importance of Self-Healing Working with Reiki begins with oneself. Before attempting to heal or improve a relationship, it is essential to look inward and ask: What aspects of my energy need attention? Am I projecting insecurities, fears, or resentments onto my relationships? Through self-healing, we can balance energy, foster self-love, and strengthen our ability to establish healthy boundaries. This creates a solid foundation for interacting with others from a place of integrity and authenticity. Healing Relationships Through Reiki Reiki offers tools to heal relationships on an energetic level: 1. Sending Energy to Relationships: Using the distance healing technique, practitioners can direct positive energy toward a specific relationship. This does not mean controlling or manipulating the situation but sending intentions of peace, harmony, and mutual understanding. 2. Energy Cleansing: Relationships can accumulate dense energy due to conflicts or past experiences. Reiki can help release these burdens, allowing for a fresh start. 3. Chakra balance: Each relationship may be associated with one or more energy centres (chakras). For instance, communication conflicts may relate to the throat chakra, while trust issues may link to the heart chakra. Working on these centres can unblock and restore harmony. Daily Practices to Foster Healthy Relationships In addition to specific Reiki techniques, we can incorporate habits into our daily lives to nurture our relationships: · Practicing Gratitude: Recognizing and appreciating the blessings each relationship brings, even in challenges. · Meditating for Empathy: Using guided Reiki meditations to develop a deeper understanding of others' emotions and perspectives. · Setting Clear Intentions: Before interacting with someone, we can set a positive intention, such as fostering peace or strengthening mutual understanding. Unconditional Love as a Guide One of the fundamental principles of Reiki is unconditional love. This concept invites us to accept others as they are, without judgment or attempts to change them. In relationships, this means offering support, respect, and understanding, even when facing differences. Reiki reminds us that every person we encounter is a reflection of ourselves. By honouring this connection, we can transform our relationships into sacred spaces of learning and evolution. Conclusion From a Reiki perspective, interpersonal relationships are more than mere interactions; they are an exchange of energy and an opportunity for healing and growth. By working on our internal energy, we can create a positive impact on our relationships and experience deeper, more harmonious, and meaningful connections. This inner work also extends outward, promoting collective healing and nurturing a greater sense of unconditional love and compassion in the world
By Esther Oon-Bybjerg January 28, 2025
Your partner forgets to text you back after a long day, and you think, "They don’t care about me." Or they casually mention plans with friends that don’t include you, and you wonder, "Am I not important to them anymore?" These passing negative thoughts may seem trivial, but they reflect deeper narratives we unconsciously construct about our partners and relationships. In relationships, the way we think about our partners and their actions matters deeply. As relationships evolve, we develop beliefs about our partners and the relationship. These beliefs shape how we feel, act and respond to them. As a couple therapist, I have witnessed how it is often not the events themselves that drive disconnection, but the interpretations and narratives we attach to them. Relationships get strained by negative thought patterns because these hidden beliefs about our partners and their actions silently erode connection and fuel resentment. However, a simple shift in mindset can improve the quality of your relationship. The Cycle of Negative Perception We often assume that our perceptions of reality are objective. However, our minds act as powerful filters, shaping how we interpret our partner's words and actions. For instance, if you believe, “They don’t care about me,” a forgotten text message might feel like proof of neglect. On the other hand, if you think, “They’re doing the best they can,” the same situation might seem like a genuine oversight which is understandable. These thoughts set the emotional tone for your relationship, influencing how you feel during moments of connection or tension. Small disappointments or unmet needs that go unaddressed can gradually shift your perspective, leading you to interpret interactions through a lens of frustration or resentment. This process can be driven by cognitive biases which are mental shortcuts that help us process information quickly, but they can also distort reality in ways that harm relationships. Here are some common thought patterns that I often see in couples: Confirmation bias Selectively focus on evidence that confirms our existing beliefs, ignoring anything that contradicts them. If you believe your partner is inconsiderate, you'll likely notice every instance of forgetfulness while overlooking their thoughtful gestures. Black-and-white thinking Seeing things as either all good or all bad, such as “They never listen to me” or “They’re always selfish.” This mindset prevents you from seeing the complexities in your partner’s behavior and stops you from appreciating the shades of gray in their actions. Personalization Interpreting your partner’s actions as a direct reflection of their feelings toward you. For example, when they’re late, you might think, “They don’t respect my time,” instead of considering that they could be dealing with an unexpected situation. Mind reading Assuming you know your partner’s thoughts or intentions without asking or clarifying. If they don’t initiate physical affection, you may think, “They’re not attracted to me anymore,” when they may simply be tired or dealing with stress. Catastrophizing Jumping to the worst possible conclusion, such as thinking, “This argument means we’re heading for a breakup,” instead of seeing it as a normal part of any relationship. Negative filtering Focusing only on your partner’s flaws while disregarding their positive qualities. For example, after a few instances of your partner being late, you may start seeing them as unreliable, ignoring all the times they’ve been on time. Ways to Reset Your Mindset Changing entrenched thought patterns isn't about ignoring or avoiding important issues. It's about cultivating a more mindful and intentional approach to your relationship. Negative thoughts can quickly escalate emotions, leading to impulsive reactions that hurt the relationship. A mindset reset helps you assess the situation more objectively respond more thoughtfully. Here are some strategies to break free from the negative thought patterns. Cultivate gratitude Instead of focusing on what's wrong, consciously seek out moments of kindness, no matter how small. Appreciate the thoughtful gestures your partner makes. Recognizing these efforts reinforces the positive in your relationship, helping you see your partner in a more favorable light. Challenge your assumptions The next time a negative thought arises, pause and challenge it. Ask yourself, "Is there another way to interpret this?" Instead of defaulting to "They’re not prioritizing me," try reframing it as "They’re just overwhelmed with deadlines right now." This shift in perspective can defuse unnecessary tension and foster a deeper understanding between you and your partner. Seek clarification, not conclusions Instead of jumping to conclusions based on a fleeting moment, engage in conversation. For example, say, “I noticed you seemed quiet earlier. Would you like to talk about it? Asking questions shows genuine interest in your partner’s feelings and prevents misunderstandings. Embrace a growth mindset See challenges as opportunities for growth, not signs of incompatibility. When conflicts arise, view them as chances to improve your communication and problem-solving skills together. A growth mindset allows you to navigate difficulties as a team, strengthening your bond and building mutual support. Assume positive intent Start from a place of trust. Believe your partner cares about you and is doing their best. Even when things don’t go perfectly, choosing to assume positive intent softens the impact of misunderstandings. This mindset fosters patience, understanding, and deeper trust between you and your partner. When to seek help Sometimes, deeply ingrained thought patterns are challenging to shift on your own. Therapy provides a safe space to explore the root causes of these patterns, understand how they affect your relationship, and learn tools to address them. By recognizing and challenging unhelpful thought patterns, we can create space for mutual empathy, understanding, and respect. These changes don’t happen overnight, but with patience and intentionality, even small mindset shifts can lead to profound transformations.
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